“shut up woman! get back in the kitchen and make me a sandwich xD” the 21 year old meme blogger added to a teen girls text post for the 23rd time today. He leaned back in his chair, proud of his work, and took a break to wonder why he had never had a girlfriend.
when i cannot go out on the street w/o being sexually harrassed
what do you tell your toddler girl-child when theyre witnessing you, their mother, being barked at by men in passing cars, minutes before an old man came walking towards the both of you, as he did vulgar tongue motions at your mama.
how do you hold your face together
how do you explain those hideous actions and tell that child thats unacceptable and wrong and no one should have to take it
when theres absolutely nothing i can do for myself
except be silent and rush away in hopes i can at the very least escape or lessen the effects
what do you do?!
and how do men live w themselves?
i cant put the feeling of helplessness and despair and horror into words, that she not only has to see it but this will be her fate too, and theres nothing i can do… .
“One white woman raised her hand and protested, “Why are we reading about Black people? I thought this was a women’s studies class.” The professor lost her temper and told her that in case she didn’t know, it was a Black woman teaching the class and that Black people can also be women. The white woman started crying and angrily left the class. I was amazed at this white woman’s sense of entitlement and privilege, of being able to protest and cry in the classroom.”—
Siobhan Brooks, ”Black Feminism in Everyday Life”
The failure to grasp intersectionality that I think a lot of white feminists (and really people of every type of movement seem to miss)
“Gentrification: The displacement of poor women and people of color. The raising of rents and the eradification of single, poor and working-class women from neighborhoods once considered unsavory by people who didn’t live there. The demolition of housing projects. A money-driven process in which landowners and developers push people (in this case, many of them single mothers) out of their homes without thinking about where they will go. Gentrification is a premeditated process in which an imaginary bleach is poured on a community and the only remaining color left in that community is white …”—Taigi Smith, “What Happens When Your Hood is the Last Stop on the White Flight Express?” (via wretchedoftheearth)
The crossroads of Color and Fatness are complex. In both states of being he people living them are dehumanized. If you are a person of color you aretold that you ar wrong and less valid and valuable.
For example women and men of color are objectified and told our dark skin is too erotic. Too sexual. We are turned into a fetish and robbed of our innocence and told we should be glad for this vile grasping exotic fertilization. We should be honored that we are considered attractive and “Sexual objects” by “real people.” No A black woman in lingerie is no more erotic that a white woman. A black woman is not inherently sexual and a white woman is not inherently innocent. We are tol that we because we are people of color are not deserving of love respect representation and humanity. We are delicate, genteel, emotional, serious, we are human.
Men and women of size of different ends of the fat spectrum are told that our bodies are wrong, unhealthy, offensive, and disgusting. We are dehumanized and our health needs are ignored by medical professionals who chalk every problem we have to our fat. Fat men and women are likewise told to be thankful for any sexual or romantic attention even if it is violent. We are told that because we are fat we are not deserving of respect and love humanity or innocence.
And this intersection becomes clear to me as I see more and more of the same language used to dehumanize both fat and non-white bodies. Both fat people and people of color are hypersexualized and sexually invalidated by this language. Black women and men and fat women and men are not capable of restraint and controlling their appetites. They are too lazy to rein in their bodies and lose their fat and resist the advances of people they are not attracted to. NO! This is not true. Black women are women we are perfectly capable of controlling our desires and appetites but we should not have to to make you comfortable. Black men are men and perfectly capable of controlling their natural desires and instincts but they should not have to to make you comfortable. Fat women are women and should not have to deny themselves for your comfort. Fat men are men and are perfectly capable of handling the human dignity thin people are and should not have to deny themselves for your comfort.
Despite objections by George Zimmerman’s attorneys, the public will get to hear 145 additional phone calls Zimmerman made from the Seminole County jail, as well as the statement of a witness who says he doesn’t like black people.
The witness, identified as “Witness 9” in prosecution documents, has not been publicly identified. One of her two statements has been withheld from the public so far, and attorney Mark O’Mara argued it should stay that way.
In her other statement, Witness 9 says that she knows Zimmerman, as well as his family.
“I know George, and I know that he does not like black people,” she said, speaking to a Sanford police investigator. “He would start something. He’s a very confrontational person. It’s in his blood. Let’s just say that.”
She went on to describe Zimmerman and his family as “just mean and open about it, and I don’t know what he’s capable of, but I do know things that he’s done to me that I would never, I would never talk to him about ever again.”
O’Mara wrote in a motion that the not-yet-released second statement “is not relevant” to the shooting death of 17-year-old Trayvon Martin, and would “serve to reignite and potentially enhance the widespread public hostility toward Mr. Zimmerman.”
However, Circuit Judge Kenneth Lester wrote in an order filed Friday that public records law requires the release of evidence, unless it would present a “serious and imminent threat to the administration of justice.”
The statement, Lester writes, does not reach that high bar.
O’Mara also asked the judge to seal 145 of 151 jail phone calls made by Zimmerman, arguing they’re irrelevant to the case and the people Zimmerman talked to have a right to privacy.
The judge rejected that argument. People called by an inmate, he wrote, “are specifically advised that their calls will be recorded.”
It was not immediately clear when the statement and calls would be released. The order comes as Zimmerman has requested a new judge in the case.
However, Daralene Jones, a reporter for an Orlando news station, has found additional statements by “Witness 9” accusing Zimmerman of sexually molesting her as a child. From her Twitter:
#Witness9 “He would rub and grab my chest, put his hands down my pants…more with his *******..” #GeorgeZimmerman [x]
#Witness9 …”There is one more victim, but she will deny it ..says she doesn’t want to talk about it.” #GeorgeZimmerman [x]
#Witness 9 …”at this time I was 12…#GeorgeZimmerman was 14” [x]
#Witness9 “He told me that he had to have surgery on his penis b/c he couldn’t pee..so he made me look at scars” #GeorgeZimmerman [x]
#Witness9 “He would say we weren’t doing anything, just playing hide/seek…I was a kid, didn’t know any better.” #GeorgeZimmerman [x]
#Witness9 “He would put his pants under my underwear…basically…****** me…” #GeorgeZimmerman [x]
#Witness9 “We would all play in front of TV…he would reach under blankets/try to do things & I would try to push him off #GeorgeZimmerman [x]
#Witness9 says she was molested by #GeorgeZimmerman from the time she was 6 years old. [x]
There are also more personal accounts of how totally not racist Zimmerman and his family was:
#Witness9 #GeorgeZimmerman’s mother protested very loud. Someone was talking about Obama…she said I don’t like Obama…b/c he’s Black. [x]
#Witness9 says #GeorgeZimmerman and his family have always said they don’t like Black people who don’t act like White people [x]
Unfortunately, Jones is reporting that the allegations of sexual misconduct will probably not make it into his trial.
Which, to my mind, is a pity. To me, this shows a clear pattern of aggression and disregard for personal rights and space - all of which were definitely factors the night he murdered Trayvon Martin.
We don’t need no water, let the motherfucker burn.
Some people confuse ECPs with medication abortion pills, but they are not the same thing. (At all.) Levonorgestrel, the progestin hormone in Plan B One-Step and Next Choice, has no effect on an established pregnancy. All ECPs prevent pregnancy by delaying ovulation, so the egg and sperm never meet up. Studies show that ECPs are not effective if a woman has already ovulated.
Little-known fact: After sex, sperm hang around in the fallopian tubes for days waiting for an egg to appear. If an egg doesn’t show up, the sperm eventually give up. That’s why ECPs only work for up to 5 days after sex, and why it’s important to take them as soon as you can.
Okay, guys, here’s the situation. thelittlekneesofbees is having a hell of a time right now after coming out to their family. Their home situation has gotten to toxic levels and they are literally having to live a lie to make sure their parents don’t kick them out. They need to move out, ASAP, but are lacking the funds. You can read about their situation here[[WARNING: triggers for religious abuse, homophobia and probably related others I missed.]]
I’m not a great artist, but I wanted to do what I could to help them. I understand their situation, and I know others out there know it even more-so. No one should have to live in fear of their parents, their parents’ ideology, or their bigotry. thelittlekneesofbees is asking for any kind of donation, but as of right now, they’re running out of time.
SO. I’m offering my services as an artist. I’m not amazing, but if you’d like, I’ll digitally paint a bust of you, or another character/person of your choice, for a $5 donation that will go straight to thelittlekneesofbees.
Here’s some quick samples of my artwork (my DA is here with fancier pieces):
Here’s how you do it: 1. Message me with your art request. Give me details about what you’d like/send me a picture of you/of whomever else you’d want me to draw. I’m not good with drawing animals, so no anthro unfortunately. ): 2. Send $5 to thelittlekneesofbee’s paypal donation address at kissedbyfire or by going here directly. Once they’ve sent me a message about receiving the donation or you send me a screenshot of the paypal checkout screen/the confirmation email (whatever’s easier), I’ll carry on with your art piece. 3. Once it’s been confirmed, and I’ve finished the piece, I’ll send you a screenshot to make sure it’s what you want. :) If it is, I’ll send you the full resolution finished picture! 4. Congrats, you’re awesome!
PLEASE consider donating. I know what it’s like to have a parent force their ideology on you and basically dehumanize you because of your sexuality/faith/etc. It’s barbaric, and if you can help thelittlekneesofbees, I cannot thank you enough on their behalf. Even if you can’t afford it, please signal boost this post!!!! If you can afford less than $5, simply donate it when you can.
ALSO: If you are able to help by offering your own artistic talents in any way to help bring in more donations, PLEASE contact thelittlebeesofknees with the offer to help. Every bit counts!
International study to look at misdiagnosis, social exclusion and stress among females on autistic spectrum.
Estimates of the ratio of females to males diagnosed with Asperger’s syndrome or high-functioning autism varies from 1:4 to 1:10. No one understands this gender disparity: whether women really are less likely to be on the spectrum than men – or whether doctors are failing to spot the disorder in women.
In your opinion, would it be racist for someone to find some ethnicities more physically attractive than others? But not in any way against the idea of dating someone from any ethnicity if they found them physically attractive (and found their personality attractive also of course). I could see how someone would be offended if you randomly went up to them and told them you didn't find them attractive, but would just a kept to yourself personal preference still be racist?
As long as you aren’t fetishizing anyone or saying “I’d never date a ______ person”, I don’t think having personal preferences is problematic, no.
While we talk a lot about harmful media beauty ideals like extreme thinness, appearance-focused “fitness,” sex appeal, and photoshopping phoniness, one of the most oppressive ideals excludes anyone who isn’t … white.We call it the whitewashing of beauty.
In a country where a full one-third of the population is black, Native American, Asian, Pacific Islander, Hispanic or Latina, the serious underrepresentation of women of color in media is really disturbing. Further, when you only account for the women of color shown in positive roles or depictions – especially those depicted as beautiful or desirable – the number is almost negligible.
The mainstream beauty ideal is almost exclusively white, making it all the more unattainable for women of color. Though beautiful women of color like Beyonce, Jennifer Lopez, Queen Latifah, Rihanna, Jennifer Hudson, Halle Berry and others have achieved renown in U.S. culture, media representations of these women have become increasingly “anglicized” or “whitewashed” over time, with lighter-colored, straighter hair, lighter makeup, colored contacts and often shrinking figures.
Even when the women are being recognized for something other than their beauty, like, say, an Oscar nomination for incredibly talented actress Gabourey Sidibe of “Precious,” magazines like Elle still feel the need to whitewash her in order to feature her image on the cover.
While representation of women of color in media has increased slightly over the past decade, finding positive depictions of women with dark skin tones or natural hair is still nearly impossible in mainstream media.Further, when we do see women of color represented as beauty icons in media, they almost always already fit white ideals –meaning they already have light skin tones, light-colored, straight hair, ideally “white” facial features, thin figures, etc.
Essentially, WOC are viewing a distorted reality and holding themselves to the unattainable standard set by the non-reality of popular media – and most often, those standards are based on oppressive, power-laden ideals of whiteness.
Recognizing the ridiculous lack of diversity in representation of media, and particularly when it comes to portrayals of beauty, is absolutely crucial for people of all races.
Recognizing is the first step toward rejecting those messages and the negative feelings they inspire about our bodies.After we reject them, we can continuously redefine beauty for ourselves – on our own terms – with the help of the beautiful people in our lives who recognize other forms of beauty as well.
Fat people can (and do) suffer from eating disorders just like thin people do. The only difference is that thin people are taken much more seriously when they seek treatment/help, as to where fat people are often laughed at because of this idea that only underweight/thin people can struggle with an eating disorder. And because of this, people who are often incredibly sick and whose lives are in danger are denied treatment or are mocked and not taken seriously, all because they’re not the size that people think of when they think “eating disorder”.
Fat people have it much, much worse than thin people. And we should never even think otherwise. Don’t use thin people often having an eating disorder to show that thin privilege doesn’t exist — because fat people can have eating disorders as well, and yet they’re still rejected by society.
“A woman’s worst nightmare? That’s pretty easy. Novelist Margaret Atwood writes that when she asked a male friend why men feel threatened by women, he answered, “They are afraid women will laugh at them.” When she asked a group of women why they feel threatened by men, they said, “We’re afraid of being killed.”—
This reminds me of a discussion we had in school, and one girl was talking about living in fear of her safety because she is a girl, and this guy chimed in and was all “It’s hard for guys too! I’m so awkward around girls! It’s embarrassing!” Yeah, not the same thing, exactly?
This reminds me of an article about online (heterosexual) dating that I read a while ago. It listed men’s and women’s worst fears about meeting someone from online. The highest ranked fear that men had was that their date would be fat, whereas the highest ranked fear that women had was that their date would turn out to be violent and kill them.
So. I hate inconveniencing people and asking for stuff. Especially money. But, I’m in a pickle. I’ve been on HRT for over a year now, but since the semester ended and with it my work study job, I’ve been pretty broke.
And I now don’t have enough to pay for hormones. This is kind of a Big Deal for me. I have bipolar disorder and anything that fucks with my mood is kind of asking for trouble. Going off hormones? That’d fuck with my mood something fierce. I still haven’t really stabilised from my last episode, so I’m kind of scared of this. I don’t know. I don’t want to beg. But I don’t really know anyone who can loan me money or anything.
So, if you could, maybe donate a buck or two to me? Or reblog this? I dunno. I hate having to ask people for cash, considering how hard I know a lot of people have it. But I’ve run out of options. I won’t be getting financial aid for another month and a half, and I’ve been turned down for two jobs already. Gosh, I’m just sounding like a sob story here or something. So I’ll stop! Thank you for reading this!
“There should be a drug class, there should be sex education, there should be a class on scams, there should be a class on religious cults, there should be a class on police brutality, there should be a class on Apartheid, there should be a class on racism in America, there should be a class on why people are hungry, but there not, there classes on… gym.”—Tupac (via 8qi)
“Sexuality is both fixed and fluid; genetic and environmental; ordered and chaotic; psychological and physical; fish and flesh. It is all of these things and expressed, in humanity, in as many ways as there are human beings.”—Son of Baldwin (via sonofbaldwin)
Could someone please explain to me how if a thin person says “I eat whatever I want and don’t gain a pound! Guess it’s just my metabolism!” we nod and say we’re jealous, but if a fat person says “I watch what I eat and work out regularly and can’t lose weight” we say that they’re in denial and lying and just lazy? Cause I would really like to know. K thanks.
Yesterday a friend of mine asked me some questions regarding transitioning for a friend who has recently come out as a trans* woman. At the moment, she needs to find housing that is queer friendly because her current enviornment would prevent her from transitioning safely.
If you can help or are in need of a roommate please inbox me your name and number, and if you’re trans* or cisgender. Anon numbers will be deleted. Your blog must show evidence that you’re not a cissexist douchebag or are problematic in other areas. I don’t think that really needs to be explained.
None of the information posted to my inbox will be published, but I will send you a confirmation message in a day or so since tumblr likes to eat my messages a lot.
As some of you may know, I’m having a rough time at home.
I’m on the verge of getting kicked out for coming out to my parents and losing the 8% of tuition my parents pay for Georgetown.
I recently came out to my parents and they were not at all pleased. There was a lot of yelling and a lot of threats laid out on the table. In lieu of staying here at my parents house for the remaining summers I have my undergraduate studies I have decided it’d be best if I didn’t have to be hypervigilant and possibly land on my ass anyway and homeless for the summers. If you follow my posts tagged ‘day 82’ you’ll get a better picture of what I’m talking about.
I would use the money for leasing an apartment, buying food, and paying bills. And ONLY for the summers, I won’t take anyone’s money for fall or spring semesters because that would be asking a lot. If you would like to know what I’m buying with your money I would be more than happy to send you a message with that information whenever the time comes around.
So please DONATE BY CLICKING THE RAINBOW ON MY PAGE if you’re feeling generous.
As a single mother of two, coming up with the finances to attend university is not the easiest thing in the world to do. It is especially more difficult to do so after you already have a degree. Scholarships, grants, low-interest federal student loans, and other financial aid is much more limited to students who have already obtained a degree from a four-year university (whether they want to obtain an additional undergraduate degree or any graduate degree).
I have a Bachelor of Fine Arts in creative writing, which I obtained in 2010. Since I graduated I have been struggling to go back to school mainly for financial reasons. I’ve been stuck at the same part-time job since shortly after I graduated, despite spending time looking for work several days a week since I graduated. Every job I have applied for has either a) not contacted me or called me back when I have tried to contact them after I applied, b) told me that I am overqualified because of my degree and they can’t afford to pay me what I should have, c) told me that I do not have the qualifications due to lack of experience. Any other job that wants to hire me wants to pay me less than I am making now and won’t hire me as a full-time employee. I’m struggling to make ends meet as it is and am barely getting by only because of help from my family.
Recently I have decided that I am going to work harder to get the funding to go back to school. In addition to applying for federal financial aid (I don’t know that I will receive any) and private scholarships, I am adding a donate button to my blog for anyone who is compelled to help out. Any amount you are able to give is much appreciated. If you can’t donate, all I ask is that you please spread this around so that it gets to someone who maybe can donate. If you feel moved at all by what I am going through I ask that you please just reblog this or direct anyone who might be able to help to my donate button.
Ultimately I want to teach college/university students. Even more than that I want to start a collective co-op where a fundamental part of it will be free educational resources and instruction for anyone who needs either of those things, particularly those that are low-income. Going back to school is a step in the direction of becoming more financially stable for the sake of my children, and will also prepare me further to contribute something to those in the community who genuinely need help or want to learn something when they can’t afford to pay for the outrageous cost of higher education.
I thank and appreciate all of you who have taken the time to read or reblog this, and thank you in advance to anyone who donates. If you have any questions, please direct them here.
…In this culture, instead of using the words ‘stupid,’ or ‘asshole,’ or ‘jerk,’ for people that we vehemently disagree with and wish to put down, we use ‘bigot.’ And ‘ableist.’ And ‘privileged.’ They have become slurs. They have lost meaning for now being generalized insults that people use to cut down others. You don’t like a particular internet group? It must be because you see them as mentally ill. Bigot. Ableist. Oppressor. You don’t agree that I, an asexual, suffer the same indignities as queer people do in daily life? You’re trying to silence me. Bigot. Oppressor. You called me stupid? Bigot. Check your privilege.
What I have witnessed is a circle of people that are waiting to feel self-righteous and attack other people, because getting mad feels good. And don’t you dare pretend to me that this isn’t it, because I have participated in it. Getting mad at someone for their bigoted bullshit feels awesome. It feels righteous.You feel like you’re helping your cause for cutting other people down to size on the internet, when in actuality all you’re doing is shouting at someone who is learning nothing. Or, in more common scenarios, already knows. And in your reblogs, your own followers that your target may not necessarily know join the circular beat-down to feel awesome and righteous about themselves. And it goes on. And on. And social justice advocates eat other social justice advocates alive forever, in a sick incestuous circle and it keeps happening. And it accomplishes nothing. You are not actually fighting oppression like this.
We have misappropriated the word oppression. We have misappropriated the word privileged. We have misappropriated the word trigger, which infuriates me so much I can’t even describe. Something that you don’t like looking at is not a trigger. Something that hurts your feelings is not a trigger. It’s a word that has a very specific meaning, and you have demolished it. People no longer understand when I profess to being triggered by rape and non-con. Shaking. Crying. Flashbacks. Involuntary vomiting. I unfollow people when they post about it. It’s not personal. I’m not trying to hurt anyone’s feelings. But they will get snitty and passive-aggressive about it because they do not understand what I am trying to communicate with the word trigger. Fucking stop misusing it. Fucking stop.
It’s a vicious and toxic environment and I am tired of participating in it and I’m tired of seeing it on my dash. I am tired of people that need to be victimized and am tired of people who point fingers at everyone as victimizing them. I’m tired of misappropriation of social justice terms.
[Post edited for brevity. Bolded emphasis mine.]
This is exactly why they lost me: the Social Justice Warriors who are ever vigilant for any way to feel victimized on behalf of any minority social group, especially ones to which they don’t even belong. Most often being white and middle class, it’s like they’re trying to burn off their own privilege by straight up bullying someone else for theirs.
Language and its use really are significant but intent is just as important as word choice. Too often people are villified and their lives disregarded entirely (like the time I, who have physical and cognitive impairments, was accused of being an ableist who wants to sexually molest mentally handicapped people) because they didn’t follow some strict vocabulary determined by some arbitrary gaggle of disillusioned youth who desperately want to belong to something larger than themselves. Trying to bully people into thinking the way you do is not how you make the world a better place.
The misappropriation of social justice terms is also just out of hand. It demeans the struggles and traumas of real sufferers (like the time I saw someone who is not chronically ill nor a trauma survivor throw a hissy because they didn’t have the “spoons” to be “triggered” by some one disagreeing with them). It’s a bunch of people who took a first semester Sociology 101 class diluting otherwise very valid terms. Someone isn’t an ableist because of the use of one word. You aren’t triggered by something just because it pisses you off. You’re not being anyone’s “advocate” by vicariously playing the victim; you’re self-servedly seeking justification for the indignation you feel at the world for whatever reason. You’re already a special little snowflake so, really, just knock it off.
This perfectly sums up my problems with the tumblr community at large.
It’s like a circle jerk of “justice.” It’s really messy and only serves to make you and those in the circle feel good.
So arguments like these make me pretty uncomfortable. I’ll try to explain why.
It’s not that these posts don’t contain legitimate points. There are some people on Tumblr who have misappropriated social justice terminology in service of identities that are clearly not oppressed on the level of people of color, women, LGBT people, etc. There are some people who use accusations of one -ism to derail discussions of other -isms that they don’t experience, often ignoring that their targets also experience the first -ism (e.g. black women called out for using “bitch” while discussing racism). Social justice–style criticism can be misused and can end up shutting down important discussion; I’m not denying that. But I think these posts are more harmful than they are helpful.
• These posts are full of unwarranted generalizations. The first post purports to apply to all of “Tumblr social justice culture.” Blaitzen suggests that when Tumblr users tell people to check their privilege, or criticize them for using oppressive language, it’s always about how good it feels to get mad; they know this because they’ve done it. Which… really? Maybe that could have been a legitimate argument applied to specific people and situations, but applied this generally it’s absurd. How you acted and felt when you used to engage in social justice–style criticism does not actually give you psychic insight into the motivations of everyone who ever has. Meanwhile, when people do criticize others’ actions for entirely legitimate oppression-related reasons—which, I promise you, is far from rare—memes like this make it less likely that they will be heard.
• “Stop shouting and teach! You’re not accomplishing anything!” Yeah, that’s a tone argument. Marginalized people are not obligated to teach anyone anything. They are not obligated to be nice and palatable to people they feel are perpetuating their oppression, even if all those people did was use a word they didn’t realize was wrong. They are not obligated to accomplish anything. This is pretty basic. But also, you don’t actually even know that they’re not accomplishing anything. I, a white person, have learned a metric assload about racism from people of color on Tumblr who were “shouting” at people. Because they made excellent points, no matter if they were being mean and snarky and unforgiving and calling people oppressors and bigots and doing all those things people say are so horrible. If I’d said “Well I never!” and clicked away in a righteous (funny how two can play at that game) huff, I would have missed a ton of learning experiences. Tone arguments aren’t just messed up on principle—they actually inhibit the learning they claim to value by encouraging people to ignore or give less weight to perfectly good arguments because they don’t meet some nebulous and often unattainable standard of propriety.
And if you’re thinking, “But this isn’t aimed at them, it’s aimed at [some specific people I’m thinking of who really are being jerks for no real reason or aren’t really marginalized or are derailing]”… You may be right about those specific people. But remember, this post is addressing the entire “Tumblr social justice culture.” It is not careful about who it applies to. Which brings me to my next point…
• This post is so broad that most of it could be cosigned by pretty much anyone. Including actual bigots. Seriously. If I were, say, a vicious transphobe and I just wanted people to stop giving me shit about it, I’d probably be pretty happy with this post. Some of its points are more or less straight from the bigot handbook; for example, probably pretty much all the people reblogging this who identify as feminists have been told at some point by a misogynist that they just enjoy being offended. It’s bullshit, right? Let me be clear: I’m not saying the authors of these posts or everyone agreeing with them are bigots. I’m saying that the fact that there’s little here objectionable to bigots should give us pause. Because arguments like this can and will be used against whatever cause you care about. And not just by outright bigots, either. Because this post is so general, people will see in it what they want to see. They’ll read it and think, “I don’t do these things, but this is such a great takedown of Group X!” Your group? Is someone’s Group X. I’m not gonna suggest that if it weren’t for this post you would have been great allies and skipped off into the sunset leaving a trail of rainbows and bunnies or anything, but you know, it sure isn’t helping.
Reblogging because some great points got made, especially in light of how so many Black women and Black queer/trans* folks on Tumblr get targets for particularly vitriolic shit like death threats and rape threats.
It remains to be seen exactly what the details of Google’s new “Legalize Love” campaign are (will they focus purely on gay marriage legislation, or LGBTQ rights as a whole?) and exactly how much effort and efficacy the enormous company will be able to wield in the field of gay rights. But it looks like all those people who boycotted Oreos for their Pride ads are going to have to give up their Gmail accounts & Google searches too.
I don't give a good goddamn about who you are or how you justify being a creepy asshole, but I am not a fetish and neither is any oppressed person. If you "have fetish for trans women / Asian girls / autistic people / fat people / queer people", you are bigoted asshole and need to go fix your shit. Also, no, I am not grateful for your creepy as fuck attention, and you disgust me on a personal level.
Who lied to you? Who the fuck told you that bald ass lie?
My teacher was telling us this story of her son in kindergarten. She picks him up one day and after a few minutes of conversation, finds out he has a girlfriend—Jessica. How cute, right? Apparently, how it happened, was the girl sat down next to him and told him to put his head in her lap. He did and when she started stroking his hair, she said, “This now makes you my boyfriend.” Who knew it was that simple?
So my teacher wanted to figure out who her son’s sweetheart was, but she didn’t know who this “Jessica” was. She asked him to describe her to him, since she may be able to recall what she looked like.
He gawked, “OH MOM. She has the prettiest black hair and brown all over!” He gestured to his skin when he said brown.
“What color is your skin?” She asked him, bemused by his bluntness of skin color.
He looked at his hand—a white child—and with a puzzled look said, “I don’t know what color this is!”
And that, ladies and gentlemen, is how children see color before society and culture tell them how they SHOULD see color.
What I get out of this story:
White child can’t describe their own skin colour, because they’ve been socialized to not see it as needing description, because white is default. However, they can easily describe someone else as ‘brown’.
A child old enough to command language? Has already been receiving instructions from society about how to see color for several years.About what is default and what is marked. As is evidenced in this child’s language. This kid didn’t do anything bad or mean or wrong or even hurtful in this story. But this child DID show a reflection of marked v. unmarked category of skin colors.
Ahh…See, I took it to mean that white’s skin color isn’t always paper-white, therefore can be hard to describe using a box of crayons. I could be wrong about that assumption, though.
Also, I bolded the point you made that I did miss with my line: understanding language means that they are already being fed the society’s understanding of color or race. That is more accurate that what I originally wrote (which I striked out.)
You really think a child who has the vocabulary for ‘black’ and ‘brown’ doesn’t have the vocabulary for ‘pink’ or ‘peach’ or ‘tan’ or any other remotely accurate description of color? I can buy a five year old not describing themselves as white because they haven’t been given the vocabulary for describing race and are honestly going by visible spectrum, but that’s some serious denial going on there in your logic.
AYUP. I seriously never thought of it like that until you brought it up, as well as another blogger. But the more I think about it, the more and more I am realizing how fucking stupid that sounds x__x;
I am white myself so I didn’t know from personal experience, or as you put it: “serious denial going on there in [my] logic.”
I am really glad you replied to this story now, or else I would keep on happily living in that slice of white denial too >.<;;
You’re welcome. Glad to have been able to provide you with education.
female privilege is never having to be tested for prostate cancer.
Cis privilege is being able to say shit like this with a straight face (and that’s before you even begin to address the idea that this is “female privilege” as if it’s somehow equivalent to male privilege, meh why I am I bothering, this is probably an MRA).
Is this what MRAs actually think feminists are complaining about, though? Like, that cis women are just really mad about our periods and think that having boobs sucks? Or something? Rather than, you know, the societal conditions that make being a woman, cis or trans, a shitty and disadvantaged and dangerous thing?
I hate when I can’t tell whether these types have genuinely missed the point entirely or are very deliberately obscuring it. It’s sometimes a really close call.
Are (cis, straight) men really so insecure in their sexuality that they think that prostate cancer tests are bad enough that they constitute a form of oppression? Seriously? Completely aside from the gross misuse of the concept of “privilege”, and the cissexism, this is just bullshit.
Because being tested for breast cancer is so much nicer?
Everyone else has touched on the horrific cissexism here, so I won’t.
This too ^
This is literally just sexual insecurity. Because having a prostate cancer test involves a finger being put into your butt to check it. Which is intolerable for straight men because the top of the gender pyramid is a really narrow place.
Pap tests are probably a better comparison to prostate cancer tests. And they start earlier. And from the way they’re described it sounds like they hurt worse.
I chose breast cancer tests because they hurt like hell, they squidge your boob up between something, can’t remember what and my grandma had bruises for a week and she never bruises, but yeah, pap smears are wayyy more invasive.
Male privilege is thinking prostate exams are the worst thing ‘cause you don’t have to know about mammograms and pap tests.
Mmmhmmm, men could go out of women-orientated health lessons in my primary school, girls couldn’t go out of men’s because ‘men didn’t check themselves so you might have to do it to catch the cancer/STI before it hurts them.’
I paraphrased, but still.
There is an explicit expectation (being enforced in a cissexist way) that women will know about men’s health, because women are expected to take care of men, while the same is not expected of men (indeed, men aren’t even expected to take care of themselves).