That Feminist Dyke

legally-bitchtastic:

feministinthekitchen:

fandomsandfeminism:

the-underground-hufflepuff:

I always hear feminists complaining about how sexist it is for people to impose that women should be taught not to get raped as opposed to men being taught not to rape. This doesn’t make any sense at all. Humans have a deep set sense of morals that tells them things like murder and rape are wrong. And that’s why it isn’t culturally acceptable to rape someone. This is why if a case for rape can be proven (with some sort of evidence mind you) than the person is undeniably guilty.

But to even attempt teaching men not to rape is silly. It’s stupid. It’s pointless. Should we also teach people not to kill each other? A murderer is going to kill someone whether you tell them to or not.

I realize there are gray areas. But the best way to get rid of these situations is to not put yourself in them. I’m not going to say you have to dress conservatively, not show your boobs, or not go clubbing and get wasted by yourself, or not to walk down dark alleys at night. Just realize the risks your taking. Carry pepper spray or something I don’t care. It’s extremely easier and much more logical for women to prevent themselves from being raped than it is for men to be taught not to rape.

Regardless of whether or not YOU see the logic in it, we know FOR A FACT, that rape awareness and “teach men not to rape” campaigns DO WORK.

SOURCES

    At this point, there is relatively little evaluation research conducted with men’s programs. Yet review of this limited body of work suggests three conclusions that we will critically examine.

(1) Some programs have demonstrated success in changing men’s beliefs and attitudes regarding rape (for reviews, see Bachar & Koss, 2001; Brecklin & Forde, 2001; Breitenbecher, 2000; Flores & Hartlaub, 1998; Gidycz et al., 2002; Morrison et al., 2004). This issue is discussed in greater detail in a later section.

(2) Some programs have also reduced men’s self-reported likelihood to rape (for reviews, see Berkowitz, 2002, 2004; Breitenbecher, 2000; Gidycz et al., 2002). This is an important variable to study because it “”is associated with rape supportive attitudes, sexual arousal in response to rape depictions, aggression toward female confederates in a laboratory situation, and a history of self-reported sexually aggressive behavior”” (Breitenbecher, 2000, p. 28).

(3) There is evidence to suggest that some prevention programs might reduce men’s actual sexual aggression(Foshee et al., 2004; Foubert, Newberry, & Tatum, 2007; Linz, Fuson, & Donnerstein, 1990). Such findings are certainly promising, and this remains one of the most important research directions in this field. However, there are unique issues that must be considered when reviewing this body of research.

FACTS. 

“Humans have a deep set sense of morals that tells them things like murder and rape are wrong.” LOL NO people voluntarily join the army all the time despite knowing that, in many cases, the whole point of their being there is to kill other people. Joining the army is only seen as heroic in our cultural context because we have made it out to be that way and we don’t care that they’re killing people from countries we’re at war with, while if they murdered someone back here it would be seen as terrible. It’s nice to think that human beings are ~inherently moral~ but that just isn’t the case: people learn from their culture what is and isn’t acceptable and usually act accordingly. People (mostly men!) continue to rape because in our society they can usually do so without consequence.

When most people think of rapists, they think of scary strangers lurking in alleys. And while of course those rapists exist, 70% of rape victims knew their attacker.

A big reason for that is because people, including rapists, think that it’s not rape unless you are chasing her down an alley or slipping something into her drink. Consider Steubenville, when the rapists attacked a girl who was falling down drunk. How many times have you seen a movie or TV show in which a man likes to prey on drunk girls. I think the show that is one of the worst offenders of this is How I Met Your Mother, where even the “good” character of Marshall once said that while its wrong to prey on a girl whose stinking drunk, you’re an idiot if you don’t take a little bit of an advantage from the situation.

Or consider all the times you’ll hear that a woman is just being coy, playing hard to get or just needs the right type of persuasion. All of these imply that saying no is just a prelude to saying yes. And so men are more likely to keep pushing, no matter how firm a woman stands. I recently had to endure weeks of my ex trying to persuade me to get back together, no matter how many times I said no and explained why not. In the end, the thing that finally made him stop was me losing my temper and screaming at him in a rant that included me calling him an idiot and bad in bed. And that didn’t even make him stop because he understood that I truly did not want to get back together. He just stopped because he now thinks I’m a crazy bitch.

How many times in movies and TV have you seen a guy continue to persist in trying to woo a girl until finally he makes a big enough gesture that her icy exterior melts and she realizes that she really does love him? Even when the woman is clearly uncomfortable? I think the best example I can think of right now is Crazy Stupid Love in which a lovesick eight grader embarrasses his seventeen year old crush in front of her whole school and is still rewarded by her eventually giving him naked pictures of herself, presumably to tide him over until he’s eighteen and she can fuck him without feeling like a pedophile.

myasphyxiatedmind:

So I emailed my dad all this proof on rape statistics and he pointed out that a lot were ‘biased’ because they were woman’s groups (the fuck? how is that biased?) so I sourced him some government studies and he STILL would not believe the statistics and started going on about how you can find studies that support anything and how the Big Man tries to turn us all against each other and yadda yadda yadda.

Basically: Wah, I can’t admit that my gender commits this much violence.

And I totally called him on that too. I totally called him on being afraid to accept the evidence and statistics because he’s afraid and angry and in denial about what it says about his gender and the rape culture we live in.

We argued and debating a shitload and I’m pretty sure we aren’t even talking rn since he hasn’t answered my last email. Whatever, fucking misogynist shithead.