[My main Tumblr can be found over at myasphyxiatedmind]
If you want your ask replied to privately, just put '****' before you start typing.
My name is: Michelle, but most people call me Dark online.
My gender-pronouns are: They/them/their.
I am: 27 years old, a feminist, an atheist, an omnivore, and an ISFJ.
The Feminist: Intersectional, body positive, pro-choice, and sex positive.
My privileged identities include: Female assigned at birth (FAAB trans* privilege), white, able-bodied, allistic (?), dyadic, monogamous.
My non-privileged/oppressed identities include: Gender-fluid, fat, gray-a, neuroatypical, and gay.
I have: Obsessive Compulsive Disorder, Generalized Anxiety Disorder, Major Depressive Disorder, Dermatophagia, and Dermatillomania.
I like: Pets & animals, animal welfare, pet care & pet care education, ~*SCIENCE!*~, anatomy & physiology, roleplaying, anime/manga, computer & video games, rock & metal music.
Generally what I hear when someone says “I don’t believe in pharmaceuticals” is “I’m privileged enough not to have an illness that requires medication”
seriously the amount of times in the past two months where someone has said something to me like “Oh yeah I don’t take any medications unless I really have to because the pharmaceutical industry is evil/bad/etc” and then they stare blankly at me, expecting me to give them a pat on the back or a cookie for not being sick enough to require daily medication
like, darling, thank your lucky stars that pharmaceuticals exist or I would probably have torn out your throat and sacrificed it to the voices in my head, and I’m not even goddamn kidding
I’m just waiting for those people to become ill and start ‘believing in pharmaceuticals.’
It boggles my mind when they say that to someone they know has at least one illness that requires medication, and expect that person to congratulate them. Really, dude?
I once had someone tell me the best thing I could do was throw out my anti-depressants.
I think I laughed at him for a minute straight.
^ Don’t you love it when neurotypicals try to tell you that your SSRIs are ~evil~?
If a pill can make me not suicidal, I’m going to take it.
I give no fucks about being your stereotypical weak mentally ill person who is dependent on the evil pharmaceutical industry to live. I am far more concerned with being happy about the fact that I can take a pill every morning that makes it possible for me to be alive. Without working meds I can’t go to school. I can’t have a job. I can’t interact with people. I can’t feed myself, I can’t clean up after myself, I can’t take care of myself at all. Without working meds I am so exhausted and in so much pain and so depressed and anxious that I can’t leave my apartment. I can’t leave my room. I can’t get out of bed.
How dare anyone shame me for using a pill that fixes these problems when no other option has ever worked?
How on earth can anyone try to argue to me that taking a pill every morning that makes me functional is a worse fate than debilitating depression and anxiety? That being on pills for the rest of my life is somehow worse than killing myself at 20 years old?
Fucking this. As someone who’s been on the receiving end of an anti-psychiatric medication douchefuck spouting off at the mouth. FUCKING. THIS.
I haven’t been the target of anti-medication sentiments, but I initially resisted my therapists’ suggestions of trying medication out because I’d internalized the stigma. My reasoning was that it’s absolutely not a bad thing for people to take medication if they needed it to be happy and healthy, but *I* didn’t want to. I was afraid that I would feel weak and dependent.
Then my anxiety became extreme enough that I became suicidal- over grades and class-registration deadlines, of all things- and I got right the fuck on anti-depresants as soon as fucking possible. (That shit was SCARY.) Thankfully it turned out that my particular medication is about $8 per month. If it hadn’t been for fear of being weak or dependent I would’ve asked about the cost much sooner, and could’ve experienced mental stability a whole year or two sooner. I still have anxiety, but it’s kept at manageable levels. I’m actually happy, because I don’t spend half my time or more panicking and miserable over small things.
It’s bad enough that some people can’t afford life-saving treatment, for mental health or physical. The fact that we as a society shame people who can and do get treatment is just messed up as hell.
This person not only basically told me I was weak for using psychiatric medication, they invalidated my experiences with OCD, pretty much saying it wasn’t actually a mental illness but ‘just the brain working more rapidly’.
I sobbed for two days after the conversation with this person. I never imagined that a conversation like that would be so damaging to my mental health but it tore me down in a very bad way. These ableist shitheads have no fucking idea the damage they do. They’ve never experienced severe mental illness that requires psychiatric medication and they have absolutely no comprehension of what it’s like.
They seriously do. At least lifers admit they don’t want me to have a choice. Choicers let me have a choice, but as long as it’s within what they’ve defined as acceptable. Outside of that, well, I’m just an irresponsible, childish [ableist slur], ain’t I?
When people say “using abortion as birth control” — however inaccurate because an abortion IS birth control — I assume they mean “someone who gets pregnant and gets abortions all the time instead of getting on the pill”. Do they not realize that these people they’re attempting to judge are kind of urban legends? Do they not realize how EXPENSIVE abortions are? When you’re shelling out potentially $300-$1000 for the procedure — even without the social stigma, the harassment by “well-meaning” protesters, even fear — believe me, it’s not something you would want to do even once.
I actually would use abortions as my primary birth control. I’m the urban legend. I’ve only had one abortion but I generally don’t use birth control at all. I won’t use anything hormonal because I don’t want estrogen and whatnot in my body for trans reasons. And I’m really not a big fan of condoms because I have a latex allergy and they’re pretty overpriced.
I live in England. Abortions are free, there’s no protesters (at least not at the clinic I used for my abortion) and I actually really enjoyed the day I had my abortion. The clinic was friendly, the drugs they gave me were awesome, and I got to have a fun day in London.
So, yes, I’m the urban legend. I enjoyed my abortion, and until I can afford to get sterilized (very unlikely), I’m probably going to use abortion as birth control.
(bolded bits) Aarrgh, thiiiisssss. Once I said that I didn’t want estrogen birth control because I’m trans and I got fucking jumped (on a forum) for it. Yes, trans folk who are okay with estrogen birth control, that’s nice for you, it would make my dysphoria worse. The progesterone only ones tend to increase depression and have a list of other issues- because that is what I need. More depression. It got better as time went on, but not great, and if I didn’t get so fucking depressed on my period it wouldn’t have been worth it, and I think it made it harder to do sexy stuff. I know a few trans folk who were specifically told not to use it because it’d make their depression unmanageable. I don’t have a latex allergy, but my partner does so it’s not like that’s an option. I also can’t help but wonder if condoms could cause dysphoria for trans folk who have a penis, which is not something I want for my partner.
Birth control is really not designed for all trans folk.
All of this^. Honestly, the only birth control I’m comfortable with (for me personally) is sterilization, and that’s just not an option here in the States due to paternalistic gate-keepers and the exorbitant cost even if I managed to find a doctor. And unlike with NHS (in Cydne’s case), abortions are expensive and highly restricted here. So even though I would have zero qualms about getting one (or more) that isn’t something that’s affordable. So what options is someone like me left with? Yeah…I get to never have sex, have sex and be terrified of getting pregnant which would mentally destroy me (not to mention bankrupt me), or wait until I’m like 40 to be sterilized. #nonbinaryreprojusticeproblems :/